Drugged by Disney Part I

Family visits to Disney theme parks are so good they’re pure evil. I have a theory why these entertainment complexes are beloved throughout the world. It’s because Disney leaves nothing to chance—they saturate a visitor’s five senses, provoke tactile overload, leave you wanting more.

Some people love Disney so much they make it a mission to visit all 13 Disney parks worldwide. We’ve only experienced five so far, in Tokyo and Orlando. But we’ve been repeatedly drawn to Walt Disney’s magic just like billions of people before us.

Lady E. and M. in Tokyo Disney in 2014 (left), versus the recent trip to Disney in Florida (right).

Let’s explore The Rising Family’s™ fall visit to Disney’s four Orlando, Florida, theme parks using homo sapiens’ five main methods of perception, our senses, as the prism.

On Day 1 of our trip to the Disney World Resort in Florida the first thing that signaled we were entering family entertainment’s Mecca -- the Magic Kingdom -- was the immaculate highway with the colorful signage screaming “IT’S DISNEY TIME, BABY.” 

Next came the massive parking lots, replete with easily recalled parking symbols and numbers. Choreographed transfer trains. Efficient security searches (yet with smiling, cheerful guards!). And waves upon waves of people. It’s all rather overwhelming.

Day 2’s EPCOT Center experiences were focused on visits to various nations’ cultural pavilions and restaurants that ring a lake. We took a counter-clockwise walking loop and called on the Canada pavilion. There we viewed the ‘all about Canada, eh’ movie featuring Martin Short. It was good, lighthearted fare, all framed by a mini Chateau Laurier and indigenous peoples’ art from British Columbia.

We lunched at the Japanese pavilion’s Endo Restaurant, in the shadow of a full-sized replica of a Buddhist shrine. I genuinely felt like we had stumbled upon in a little piece of Japan. The only thing pulling us back to the reality of being in the USA was a couple of angry customers volubly complaining to the polite-but-firm Japanese cashiers who clearly had taken assertiveness training.

On Day 4, we went to Disney’s Hollywood Studios park. Our first ride was the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror, seemingly a replica of an old 1930s hotel turned into a gravity-defying ride. 

Courtesy of the Orlando Weekly

We went up, strapped into our seats. It was dark. Then the entire room was hurtled up, then abruptly plunged down into the inky darkness. Marina was screaming and clutching my arm, freaked out by the dark and the feeling of sudden weightlessness. Hilarity ensued when the extended downward drop caused Elena’s popcorn container top to fly off, with the popcorn suspended in front of our eyes. Then a guy behind us said, “hey, it’s popcorn.” There was collective laughter.

After this trip, I will always associate the infernal “It’s a Small World” tune with Disney. It greets you as you enter the parks in the morning.

Anyway, back to our story. Another sound that I enjoyed was the narration during Walt Disney's “Carousel of Progress,” a rotating theater show attraction. First debuted amid the rosy optimism of mid-1960s America, it features a series of vignettes describing the upward climb of a typical American family from the advent of electricity around 1900, through subsequent technological advances achieved through the 1920s, 1930s, 1940s, and then abruptly skipped to the almost-present.

Courtesy of Walt Disney World Resorts 

Basically, a folksy guy in a kitchen depicts progress in America though the products that made people's lives better. I had more than a few wiseass remarks to share, contrasting the bubbly optimism of this attraction with some of the..err…social challenges we are living through lately. 

The following day I could not evade the sounds of campy 1970s rock courtesy of the .38 Special concert near the American Adventure pavilion at EPCOT. Bluuurg!

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the buzzing sound of commerce that hummed in every park we visited over the course of four days. Think of cash registers ringing mixed with the clean ssssshnick sound of a debit cards slicing through the payment sensor channels. The soundtrack of succe$$.

We walked around for hours every day. Our noses were inundated by many scents—for example, regular whiffs of food being cooked in restaurant kitchens, cotton candy or ice cream stalls, or hot dog and popcorn vendors. Our olfactory senses were sozzled with whiffs of BBQ, sweets, citrus and spices. We grazed more than feasted, as much due to the sheer variety of food as our hectic schedules. Maximizing attraction rides times, seeing and doing as much as we could each day, all amid the 90-degree heat and humidity, dampened the desire for heavier foods. (Still, we saw the occasional herd of Germans gnawing on Turkey legs. Uggh.) 

But what a cornucopia of delicious aromas, everywhere you went. Well done, Disney! 

To be continued.